Tale of the Tape: Week 5 Seattle vs Cowford

[Seattlehawk94]

TOTT has finally recovered from his hangover and my alter ego is finished with jailtime from smashing all the bottles of Apple Sauce in the store this past Sunday afternoon...Can the Hawks recover as well?

We threw Jacksonville in the hopper and found it's less boring than Indy but more boring than Tacoma....At least there are hot chicks in bikinis...Well, the ones left before the Gators ate them on the beach....

Population:
Seattle: 3,344,813 (14th)
Jacksonville: 1,323, 234 (40th)

Winner: Seattle, Jacksonville was an "iffy" market when the NFL put a team there and the attendance is proving the other cities in the 1995 Expansion right...

Name:
Seattle: Named after a local Duwamish chief named Sealth. His grave on Bainbridge Island looks at his namesake city.
Jacksonville: Named for Andrew Jackson, was named "Cowford" first because it was an easy place to ford cattle across the St. John's River.

Winner: Seattle, COWFORD? Seriously? Ever played "Oregon Trail" in school? Everytime I tired to "ford" something I ended up killing half of my people..Sucked because then I couldn't write a catching epitaph on their grave stone...

Nickname:
Seattle: Emerald City
Jacksonville: The River City

Winner: Seattle....How many cities in the USA are on rivers? Kinda boring actually!

Sports Teams:
Seattle: Seahawks, Mariners, Sounders
Jacksonville: Jaguars

Winner: Seattle, though Jacksonville did have a USFL team...lol

Sports Teams Lost:
Seattle: 2-Supersonics, Pilots
Jacksonville: 0

Winner: Jacksonville, though they've only had ONE TEAM and those same Jags are the frontrunners to be playing in Los Angeles Stadium when it opens...

Championships:
Seattle: 2-Mets won 1917 Stanley Cup, Supersonics won 1979 NBA FInals
Jacksonville: 0

Winner: Seattle, we finally find a city where we beat in this category...

Notable Landmarks:
Seattle: Space Needle, Columbia Center, EMP
Jacksonville: St. John's River, swamplands

Winner: Seattle, trailer park methlabs in swamps do make good COPS episodes though...

Beer:
Seattle: Pyramid, Redhook, Hale's Ales
Jacksonville: Budweiser

Winner: Seattle...Like St. Loser, the St. John's River boasts America's favorite pisswater....

Cuisine:
Seattle: Raw Oysters, Red Mill Burgers, Salmon, Crab
Jacksonville: Alligator, Checkers Burgers

Winner: Seattle, lEast Coast seafood sucks and gator tastes like rubber chicken...

People:
Seattle: Pearl Jam, Quincy Jones, Bill Nye
Jacksonville: Allman Brothers, Rick Dees, David Hasselhoff, Limp Bizkit,

Winner: Jacksonville, we really don't have that many non-sports celebs...

Natural Landmarks
Seattle: Mt. Rainier, Puget Sound, Olympic Mountains, Cascades
Jacksonville: Atlantic Ocean, St. John's River

Winner: Seattle, basically they live in a hurricane filled tidal swamp...

Head to Head:
Seattle: 3
Jacksonville: 2

Winner: Seattle...We lost to them the last time we played them on Kickoff Weekend 2005....How'd that work out for us?

Overall Winner: Seattle 10-2, once again a boring city with a boring team...Pretty soon the Jags will move to LA and it'll just be a boring city....The NFL will miss "Blackoutsonville"---not really...Will Jags fans even notice they are gone?

Well at least they aren't still named "Cowford"...So they've got that going for them! :lol:

Enjoy the Game!!

 

[HawksFan83]

i think in reality we win the people thing, i know theres a bigger list of people to come out of seattle that are more known/important in the us than in jacksonville

 

[bobflipaburger]

Yeah, I mean Limp Bizkit? One of the crappiest bands of my life time.

 

[HawksFan83]

Limp was not crappy, seriously three dolla bills was a dope ass cd! it was a bit of a fall off after that, but the songs that werent put on the radio were actually really decent. Both significant other and chocolate star fish had some great songs that no one's heard unless they had the CD, well there was Boiler from Star fish, That song has great lyrics and rocks as well, and fred doesnt do his rap/rock thing in it. Even the newest cd, results may vary had some great songs, almost over and eat you alive were good.

 

[Seattlehawk94]

Dude...The FUCKING HOFF is from JAX! :lol: Any place the HOFF is from HAS to rule... :lol:

 

[bobflipaburger]

Limp was not crappy, seriously three dolla bills was a dope ass cd! it was a bit of a fall off after that, but the songs that werent put on the radio were actually really decent. Both significant other and chocolate star fish had some great songs that no one's heard unless they had the CD, well there was Boiler from Star fish, That song has great lyrics and rocks as well, and fred doesnt do his rap/rock thing in it. Even the newest cd, results may vary had some great songs, almost over and eat you alive were good.

Just not my style of music I guess.

 

[HawksFan83]

Ya for me i enjoy all styles of music, i have a massive cd collection so its like i got just about any style of music you could think of.

Ne wayz, Seattle is a better place to be than jacksonville

 

[Seattlehawk94]

i think in reality we win the people thing, i know theres a bigger list of people to come out of seattle that are more known/important in the us than in jacksonville

Then next week you do it....

Every week I try to rotate it and am now almost down to repeating the same people over and over..

Bill Gates, the guy who played "Al" on Home Improvment", and the hot piece of ass from "Scary Movie".

 

[HawksFan83]

DUDE! anna faris is so hot! she's from Edmonds...ooo the dirty things i would do to that chick.

 

[cokeheadbobby]

Yeah, I mean Limp Bizkit? One of the crappiest bands of my life time.

Molly Hatchet, Lynyrd Skynyrd were left out

 

[Seattlehawk94]

DUDE! anna faris is so hot! she's from Edmonds...ooo the dirty things i would do to that chick.

Yeah, when she's considered "famous" by people in this town compared to some opponent fans celebs we lack....

If you don't believe me go to Wikipedia....Most "Seattle famous" are local reporters and radio people, oh and serial killers....We suck when it comes to producing famous people....

Hell, we'll never live down Kurt Gobang...Err...Cobain... :lol:

But back to Anna Faris....I'd snort coke out of her asscrack in a cheap motel room if she'd let me... :lol: And I've never even done or had the urge to do coke... :lol:

 

[bobflipaburger]

I didn't know she was from around here... Wonder if she still lives in the area... I should make a hotel reservation just in case :lol: :lol:.

 

[Seattlehawk94]

Sure Bob...You do that, I'll even let you and 83 fight for sloppy seconds! :lol:

 

[bobflipaburger]

Probably a good idea... You don't want me ruining her for you :lol:.

 

[Seattlehawk94]

I had a friend who had a used boat called the "Sloppy Seconds", they wouldn't let him park it at the Des Moines marina without him covering up the name... :lol: :lol:

He sold it not to long after the Vikqueens "Love Boat" cruise.....Think it was because I always had more comments than before about it after that... :lol: :lol: